woooo. 100th post.

This is my 100th post!! weeee.. hahaha..



Taylor Lautner is sooooo hot!!! <3. I just watched a short clip of Jacob (Taylor Lautner) transforming into a werewolf and come to protect Bella and all and ahhhhh. I sound like those crazed fans that when they actually see him in real life will faint but I don't really care right now. I'm way too far into fantasy land. weeee. Almost everyone who has read the book or watched the movie (guys excluded) has been or is in this ahhhh state sometime while reading/watching the book/movie. Stephanie Meyer totally rules!! The Twilight Series is so nice. I'm totally gonna reread all the books after my SPM. XD.

* this paragraph was a little edited cause some error totally wiped out almost the whole paragraph so had to rewrite whatever I could remember with a lot of editing in between.



I don't know why but I like Edward the character but Jacob the actor. I find Robert Patinson to be kinda freaky, I don't know why. haha. Jacob in the book kinda sounds desperate but in the last book he's like so loving to Renessme which makes him really cute. =P.



Anyways, I should get back to studying Sejarah. I'm so totally procrastinating right now. So typical of me. XD.

bloggg..

I feel like blogging about something

but I have nothing to blog about

so I'm just gonna post this. XD.

hmmm. Suprisingly it doesn't bother me. It doesn't affect me like I thought it would have. I wonder why. On second thought, nyeeh.

The Visit and Random Stuff

Yeah so as the title says, I visited Xin Zhi today. Aunty came over in the morning to bake FRESH MUFFINS to give him and his family as a "buah tangan" kinda . I hope you liked the muffins Xin Zhi plus I know you'll read this since you told me you actually read my blog. XD. So called him about 12-ish to confirm whether I could come and he told me he couldn't at first then as we were talking he asked his mum and he was like okay my mum says can so I was like yay! (well something on that line la. not so enthusiatic though. XD).

I told him I would be coming around 1-ish but ended up coming close to 1.30. XD. Sorry Xin Zhi!! I had to have lunch with my family before going off. So anyways, followed his instructions to go to his house. And when I reached there I was super nervous that my hands were actually cold. My sister, who was with me, suspected I had a crush on him since I was nervous. But I was nervous because I would be visiting him alone and I'm terrified of his mum. I decided to visit him alone because Saturday was my only day free besides Wednesday and it's so hard to ajak my frens and arrange to go visit him so finally decided to go alone la. well, not really alone also la. my sis came along with me cause she actually didn't really have anywhere else to go. XD.

So reached there and his mum opened to the door for us. I actually didn't know whether to call her teacher or to call her aunty. That's why its so hard to go to the house of your friend who's parent teaches in your school. You don't know whether to call them aunty/uncle or teacher. Visited him for about 45 mins cause I had a Bible Knowledge at 2.30 and HAD to leave. During my visit I saw his X-rays. Cool stuff. XD. Anyways, I didn't know his broken arm was THAT broken. From the X-ray it looked like it was totally broken from the arm and floating. He put in like 5 screws and a metal plate to hold it all together. The X-rays fascinated me quite a bit I have to admit. :P. My sis was more or less in the conversation so it was kinda awkward plus he being shirtless made it even more awkward. hahaha. you could say that we couldn't like have eye contact. well, I generally can't talk while maitaining eye contact but this was like I couldn't actually look at him and talk. XD. Sorry la. I've never actually sat down and talked to a shirtless guy that long if you exclude my almost always shirtless brother. XP.

Gave him a jar of stars that I made with some stuff written on the inside. He couldn't like put back the stars so I told him to either read everything and leave it and bring it the next time we see each other or he can try to put it back. So finally left about 2.25. Got to church in time for the exam. Felt like I didn't do too well in the exam though. crap. Pretty uneventful day after that. Oh yea, my dog was trying to chase and play with the frog (which normally ends up dead cause my dog is like 50 times bigger than it plus she bites. XD). So I kinda saved it by scooping it into the dustpan and pushing it out the gate and it ran away after that. Funny sight to see my dog trying to play with it but jumping up and down to avoid it. hahaha.

On a totally random note, Steven Strait is sooo hot!! I saw him in this Youtube video in which he was running in a formal clothes and damn he looked hot!! *drools* Okay back to reality. He's a really good looking dude and he's 23 but too bad he's already married to a woman who's 30. I guess he likes older woman. Well, there's always Taylor Daniel Lautner. I like his name too. It sounds so, I don't know, nice? haha. But its a really cool name. XD. ohhh. and he's like French, Dutch, German and others. so many races rolled into one. haha. Plus he's the same age as me and a Christian (well according to a website) and he's not too tall. weeee... XD and I never knew he acted in The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lava-girl.

Here's a picture of Steven Strait. *drroooolllss* :P

I couldn't find a good pic of Taylor Lautner so thus no pic of him. :P

SPM!!

SPM is a little over a month away. I never knew life as a school student would come to an end so fast. Damn. And the one person that I would have definitely spent the days with isn't there with me. Instead he's spending time in his house or the hospital. I want to visit him in the hospital (though he's only been there one night) but I'm afraid of asking his mum whether its okay. Called him yesterday to a really depressed him, a part of him I've never seen up till now. I felt like I was a little too harsh afterwards cause I kept telling him off for being so depressing. I knew he was scared of the surgery, putting a screw/a couple of screws into his arm but he sounded soooooo depressed. I know he's really scared of the idea of having his arm torn open. I kept trying to keep his mind of it but its hard knowing how he is, where he won't not stop thinking about it. Well since he doesn't have a handphone I can't really call him to check on him or how his surgery went. Well, I guess I'll have to wait till he's back from the hospital.

anyways, getting back to the topic. SPM is about 34 more days. DAMN!! Its getting so close but I'm still slacking around. ayoooo!! Why can't I freaking concentrate!??!?! Too many distractions! FYI guys, if I'm emo from now onwards till after SPM you know why. I think I really have to be in a emo mood to study where I shut off from the world. I'm giving you guys prior warning so if I seem like I don't want to talk to you or something you'll know why. The exception is when I'm online. You guys can talk to me if you see me online k? hahah.

I should be getting back to my Add Maths. yes people. I'm doing Add Maths to get my mind of things. XD.

Chao people!! take care..

Another day gone by.

Whoa. I'm blogging alot today. Well the 2 before these were done yesterday actually but just drafted it and decided to post it today, so I guess that doesn't really count. I just downloaded a few songs out of boredom of hearing the same songs over and over again. Tried to study this now but couldn't keep my head focused. Whenever I open that particular book it reminds me of what happened and him because I was doing that book when it happened and I always ask him question from that book. Shit. I have no idea why its affecting me so much or whether I'm letting this affect me. My feelings are being a bitch with me right now. My parents are like pounding me because I'm not studying but just lazing around the house and spending most of my time on the comp. Well, 2moro's saturday and I'm not really gonna enjoy it. I know what you might think, "ITS SATURDAY!! HOW CAN U NOT ENJOY IT!!". Yeah well these are the reasons why.

1. I have 4 hours of Chemistry tuition. well I don't mind that but I'm dreading it is because I'm gonna be alone. My friend would be taking it another day. I want to get it over with so decided to endure 4 hours of Chemistry tuition ALONE. Plus I haven't finished doing like 2 chapters of homework. dun really care actually.

2. I have to study or at least try to study to make up for the time I've wasted the whole week.

3. I have to study for my bible knowledge exam the next day. well, this is not so bad but because I really don't have the mood to study so I know I'm gonna struggle to concentrate.

4. Don't really dare to call him cause his mum would be at home.

That's pretty much why I'm not gonna enjoy my saturday. Well at least my sister's gonna come back from Korea 2moro. I'll definately try to make something of my weekend.

I think I have to go to school during PMR!! Shittt!!

I Want To Forget But I Can't and Now I Appreciate

There was one phone call I made to him, he suddenly shouted into the phone, when I asked what happened he said muscle contract. Its really heart wrenching to see your free, well in this case hear, your friend in so much pain but can't do much to help.

I really dun know how I'm gonna survive in school without him. All this while, I've taken advantage of him always being there and now that he's not I feel so lost. I clung to him like a security blanket and now that he's gone I feel vunerable. He's also been an encourager for me by encouraging me to study and to do my best for every exam and when he nerds he indirectly encourages me to study. You could say he was my "other half". There isn't a day where I didn't shout XIN ZHI!!! But now I guess that has come. It would definately be weird to sit next to nothing when all this while he's been there listening me to whine and rant, smacking him, discussing answers, asking him for his help and advice and even arguing with him what songs to listen to. When they say, you never know what its worth till its gone they really are true and I now know the full extent of what they mean. I wasn't emotionally prepared to say goodbye yet and now he might not be coming back to school again and SPM is 48 more days. And I know how much his SPM means for him and even that he might be able to come for.

I can still remember how much I use to hate him in Form 4 and early Form 5. I use to despise him. I wanted so badly to strangle him and I bet he wanted to do the same. Time has definately drastically changed that. He changed from my enemy to my best friend; my other half. He knows my deepest darkest secrets and everything about me and in turn I've found out so many things about him. He's helped me become a different person; to be more patient and understanding, to keep believing in myself and that I can really do it if I really wanted to. Before this happened I was wondering what would happen to us, including our other friends, when school ends. And that thought scared me because they've all become comfort zone. Stepping out was a big scare for me. I regretted not becoming closer to him earlier on because he's such a great friend and I didnt see that earlier. I use to laugh when he told me or I found that girls like him because to me I didn't see what they saw. To me he was just another annoying but fun guy who sat next to me. I still laugh and tease him but I see what they see. I've heard girls say he's every woman's dream or he's what you call a perfect guy, or close to perfect anyways and sometimes I have to agree with them. He is everything you could want in a guy.

I knew him since Form 1 when he was the hot topic in my class cause he and a girl in my class were exchanging notes but at that time she was with another guy (which I later found out that XZ didn't know). I knew him as this really shy prefect guy. I remember when we would pass each other at the corridor, he would look away or look on the floor and say hi in a really soft voice when u said hi. I use to think he was a really weird guy. Years pass and I knew who he was but never really talked to him. Finally in Form 4 I sat next to him. Initially Vigna sat next to him but she shifted to another class so I changed my place and sat next to him. We were like cats and dogs. Always fighting, and it usually ends up with me becoming emo and shutting off. When this year started, it wasn't any different. I started off the year trying to be more patient and as usual it didn't work. He and I would still fight but this time, after we fought he would call me to apologize (well, most of the times anyways). Some how both of us changed and became more patient with each other and when that happened we started to realise that we could actually get along. A friendship started to form and here we are today.

I may talk about him like he's my boyfriend or we're in love or something but that's just us. Even our classmates agree. Some people think that he and I are together or that I like him or vice versa because of how close we've gotten. When they say that I would laugh and walk away or like ewww... its Xin Zhi.. Thinking about it now, it seems really funny. Maybe we would someday down the road or something who knows but right now I'm enjoying every moment of this friendship. And not only this friendship but all the friendships I've made throughout my schooling life because after this everyone will be everywhere and nothing will ever be the same so I'm gonna cherish every moment I have with them though it may not be much longer.

Well, that's all from me now.

I Want to Forget It But I Can't.

Yesterday my best friend, who sits next to me, broke his arm and I'll never forget what happened. For those of you who dun know who he is, he's Xin Zhi. I'm gonna explain it from my view in grave detail. so those of you who get grossed out easily you might not wanna read.



It all started when Loganad came and challenged Xin Zhi to an arm wrestling match, as usual. And as usual he accepted the challenge. They were playing then suddenly can hear a crack like sound. To me it sounded as if they're hands hit the table. What followed after haunts me. My fren started screaming and I really mean screaming in pain. At first I thought he was screaming cause he lost, but as soon as my other classmates got up and had this panicked look on their face, everyone knew something was wrong. Being Red Cresent members who are trained plus human reaction, we went towards him and he was like in extreme pain. He just kept screaming. Then his face went blank. Totally blank with eyes still open. And he passed out. Some guys caught him but couldn't really hold him so they put him lying on the floor. He was in so much pain that when he passed out he was clenching his hand into a fist so hard that you could actually see the muscle being tensed up. He was out for maybe a minute then got up on his own and started holding his arm.



En. Sazli and En Shamsul came in and helped. I was talking to XZ at that time trying to ask him whether he could stand up and was kneeling quite close to him. Then when En. Sazli came in and saw that, he was looking at me one kind, like as if it was wrong for me to do that. So I was like ergh, whatever la and backed off. En. Sazli asked for a kain anduh, u know the triangle like cloth.



Me and Suey Erz ran to find Pn. Sariah (our RC teacher who has the bilik rawatan key). First place we looked was the staff room, ran towards the office then U-turned back to the staff room to look at the teachers timetable and found that she was in the class next to ours. -.-' moment!! Anyways, ran back to class that side and Suey Erz like shouted at teacher, "Pn. Lim's son broke his arm and passed out". Then those around her were like, :O. Teacher told us she didn't have the key so went back to class to tell teacher or find something else. Suey Erz thought of using the pandu puteri scarf but teacher said too short, so while XZ sat on the floor in pain, we went back to Pn. Sariah and asked whether there was any other way. She said Cik Malissa (our other RC teacher) might have the key so hastingly walked towards the other staff room and the worried and haste steps kinda made all the teachers in the staff room look at us one way. So Pn. Sariah was like explaining what happened, well she was practically shouting it. Finally she found the key to the bilik rawatan in Cik Malissa's desk.



Me and Suey Erz ran for our lives and almost tore the door down cause the lock wouldn't like unhook. When we finally got in, we like went bezerk and looked for the stuff we needed, got out slammed our already spoilt door shout and again ran for our lives. Suey Erz was holding the strecther so it took her abit longer, I ran gave the kain anduh to the teacher and let him do it. And then the shouting started. I can't explain with words how shrieking his screams were.



Everytime teacher moved his arm he would scream. And I later found out from him that teacher asked him to move his fingers and when he could, teacher was like "kamu tak patah tangan, mungkin fracture" or something to that effect.



Anyways, finally after teacher wrapped his arm, which actually made him in scream in more pain and had to be redone, they TRIED to put him on the stretcher. Every movement he made was painful for him, yeah we could tell from the shouting. finally got him on the stretcher but he couldn't lie down so put 2 bags to prop him up. Jason dunno came from where and helped out. He, Vivek, Sean and someone else I can't remember, carried the stretcher with the instructions of Jason. Yes this is where all the BSM training "some" people think was useless comes in great use. They took him down the stairs which was really scary for everyone.



They finally got him down and slowly put him down in front of the teachers staff room where his mum was. He was telling his mum in chinese that its really really painful (yes I do understand a little chinese) and that he can't feel his arm already (that part Suey Erz translated for me). By that time, a row of "spectators" had already formed. Told them to go away. Then another line formed not long after. Anyways, he some how got up from the stretcher and with some help got into the car and his mum took him to the clinic. (the goverment hospital wait would be too long, and private would be too expensive).

He was the talk of the school after that. Everyone was talking about him and what had happened and whether he'll be okay. Gave all his stuff to his bro after school. He later told me that he came back about 2 which was too long after we finished school. And he actually broke his humerus. Haih. So he can't move without feeling painful and he doesn't wanna take painkillers.